Inspirations

Success for me isn't a destination it's a journey. Everybody's working to get to the top but where is the top? It's all about working harder and getting better and moving up and up.












"Some women choose to follow men, and some women choose to follow their dreams. If you're wondering which way to go, remember that your career will never wake up and tell you that it doesn't love you anymore. "














I don't mind living in a man's world as long as I can be a woman in it.

Addicted

You were like my own personal brand of herion, my addiction.
My Favorite drug.
The first taste of you was the sweetest thing that i have ever tasted.
Your unreal love quickly posioned my blood.
It spreaded into my veins and straight to my heart.
The first dose i had was an instant addiction.
Each dose that i took in was either bitter or sweet.
I loved the way your unreal love made my heart stop beating.
I loved the way your unreal love made me take shorter breaths each day.
I loved the way your unreal love made my blood turn into fire.
All i wanted was you, i couldnt get enough.
More and more of you i craved each day, hour, minute, and second.
You played with my cravings.
You knew how addicted i had become of you.
It was like a game to you , like my life was something to play with.
You watched me burn, cry, stress, feen, fight, hold on and let go.
You saw the old me disappear into the darkness, and created this new person in me.
An addict.
An addict that must find rehab within herself and search for the person that she use to be before she became and addict of your posioned unreal love.

You were like my own personal brand of herion, my addiction.
You were my favorite drug.
And the last taste of you was the bitterest thing that i have ever tasted.

Goodbye

How do you walk away from someone you love
And take the road of someone else?
Can you reroute the course you have taken
And start over once again?

I don't really want to let you go
But inside me I know I must;
The times we've loved . . . the times you've hurt me
My heart still says stay . . . but it's my mind I must trust.

We have shared so much together
Laughter . . . fun times . . . tears
Yet sometimes we can't turn back time
We must walk away, and allow ourselves to cope.

I know one day you will be happy
And your soulmate you will find;
I know we each have one out there
Even if for now . . . only in our minds.

May life be gentle with you
May God's best come your way;
And on some quiet tomorrow
You will realize things may have been better this way....?

I Hope

For all the lies you ever told,
I hope you tell no more.

For all the tears you made me cry,
I hope you cry a million times more.

For all the stress you put me through,
I hope one day you feel it to.

For all the days that i wanted to give up but pray you would come around,
I hope the days you spend without me make you feel the same way.

For all the nights i laid awake just feening for you to be there,
I hope your nights are alone are not any better.

For all the heartache you have caused me,
I hope your heart hurts to.

In conclusion i hope Karma gets you good!

Baddest Chanel Heels

Dark Night

Its like the darkness has become my only light. Feels like im goin insane! Whats wrong with me? Something is sucking the life out of me and I'm starting to feel the pressure. I cant breath. Its getting closer, a diease of my mind controling me. I use to stand tall, so strong, unbreakable, im not me anymore. In my thoughts and in my dreams this thing is taking over me. Completely empty inside and all thats left of me is what i pretend to be. The only company that ive been surrounded by is misery. The demon within myself i let have all the power. I want it to leave me alone! Im slowly giving up because i cant seem to break out of this cage. This dark night has lasted to long. Its time i take a stand and fight this demon. I have to break free from this cage that im trapped in. I want and need my life back. I miss the old me. The peace, joy, love, strength, and happiness that i once had. This dark night has to come to an end. I will fight this demon off of my life with all the strength that i have left. I will fight until i cant fight anymore because i refuse to continue to live in darkness. The dark night will slowly fade and i will be myself again. I will have the peace, joy, love, strength, and happiness that belongs to me. The dark night shall be over.

To Young

Thoughts seize my head with whys. I felt so alone. I was overwhelmed by grief, and i expected to find compassion. I found no compassion. I saw hundreds of other bodies that were as defectively jumbled as mine. I was given a number and positioned in a category called "car accidents." On a typical weekend was the day i died. Why did we have to get into that stupid, pointless argument. But no, im just to stubborn and hard headed. I just cant keep my mouth shut i have to keep going and going and when i keep going so does he. I remember when i left the house after the argument. I tip toed to the car and snuck the car out the driveway. I was so relieved that i was able to get away from all the drama. The thought of feeling free and at peace was so amazing. It wasnt the fact of how the accident happend. I was being careless, driving way to fast, and making a very unforgivable choice. But that didnt matter. I was enjoying my freedom and having a peacful time. Then all of a sudden i heard a crash. and i felt the whole car spin. Millions of pieces of glass flew everywhere I heard myself scream the most disturbing scream that i had ever heard in my life. My entire body seemed to be twisting and turning in many uncomfrontable postions.

Gradually i awkened. It was very quiet.A police officer was standing over me. I saw a doctor. My body was jumbled. I was covered by blood. Pieces of serrated glass were sticking out all over me. It felt like i was paralyzed, because i couldnt feel anything. I tried screaming, "Dont pull that sheet over my head!" "I cant be dead." "Im to young" "Ive got a wonderful date planed out for me and my boyfriend." "Im suppose t be the most fabolous fashion designer." "A whole fantastic life is ahead of me, i havent lived yet, i cannt be dead!"

My boyfriend came to identify me. Why did he have to see me like this? Why did i have to look into his eyes as he faced the most appalling nightmare of his life? "Yes she is my girlfriend," my boyfriend told the man in charge. As he spoken those words he seem terribly tramatized.

The funeral was bizarre. I saw all of my family walk toward my casket. They looked down at me with their eyes full of saddness. Some of my friends were crying. A few of them touched my hand and blubbered as they walked by. "Somebody wake me up!" "Get me out of here!" Mom and dad were in so much pain, and i can not endure it. My boyfriend looked as if he wanted to die himself. And my grandparents were so weak from grief, they can barley walk. Everyone looks like zombies. They're in a daze. No one can believe this. I cant believe it either. "Please dont bury me!" "Im not dead!" "I have so much to live for." "I want to sing and dance." "I want to run and laugh again." "Dont put me six feet under!" "God i promise if you give me just one more chance il be the most cautious driver in the whole world." "All i want is one more chance." "Please God, Im to young.